Tuesday, April 28, 2009

ALMOST over the EDGE

Today @ exactly 11:32am I made the call all moms don't want to make. I called my husband @ work and told him I was going to lose my mind and he needed to help me. No, not help me lose my mind, maybe I should say save me... keep me from taking that oh, so tantalizing step over the edge. The final step that you take before your family, friends and neighbors look @ you and cover their mouths as they whisper about "the day she lost it".
I have a very busy 3 year old, Liyah. She is into things way more than her sister at that age. So today, I'm trying to do laundry (just like EVERY day at my house) and hang up the clean clothes, instead of leaving them in the baskets for once. As I come out of the bedroom what do I see but Liyah, with grandma's sandals out of her closet, my flip flops out of my closet, wearing Lauryn's dress out of their closet, filling the watering can at my bathroom sink and standing in a puddle (NOT from the sink!). So I do what any sane mother would do, I stick her in the shower with a soapy wash cloth while I clean up the stool, mop the floor, put her wet clothes in yet another pile of laundry, put my flip flops away, put grandma's sandals away and hang the watering can outside on the back porch. Then I go in get her out, dry her off, send her to her room so she can get yet another outfit out for the day (to keep track it's now her third one of the day!). When all of that is taken care of I go back to hanging up the clean clothes and soon Grandma Patty is telling Liyah "don't do that to them" and "you're gonna make them dead" and the real kicker "I'm gonna tell your mom". So out I come again, Liyah's picking the kitten's up by the necks (AGAIN) and grandma's fussin' (AGAIN) and mommy's MAD (again). So Liyah gets pulled to my room, nose in the corner and I'm in the closet on the phone with Greg (God Bless Him) who thankfully has a job where he can leave if he has an emergency at home. AND THIS WAS AN EMERGENCY!!!
All's well that ends well, so they say. Since no one's life ended today, I guess all is well!!
There is yet another day tomorrow to go insane, for today I have a wonderful husband and a lovely cousin who step up and help me out when it becomes more than I can handle (good luck on your interview Lydia).
And for those of you who read this and think, "wow, she really doesn't have a grip on things" let me just say.... IT WAS HER 3RD OUTFIT OF THE DAY, and only 1o:45 am at that point.


Saturday, April 25, 2009

Reduce... Reuse... Recycle....

I do believe that I have done my best since the beginning of 2009 to "Be Greener" (Okay, Liyah has been out of bed three times in the last 5 minutes saying she needs a kleenex, used 2 kleenex's and is now out here again.... I can't believe I just told my own daughter she better just eat it because she wasn't coming out here again!!) Back the the "planned" blog
Greener you say, great! We all need to do our part to keep our "environmental footprint" as small as possible. I've been taught since a youngun' not to throw trash on the ground (I still wonder everytime I spit gum out if some bird or innocent rodent will smell the berry flavor mistake it for something edible and choke to death on my gum!) and I teach my children the same things. If you see garbage laying around and there is a trash can close, just pick it up and toss it. You'll feel better for it! So this year I thought, okay let's do something, let's be proactive!
So I started to exercise (with my mom, who rocks) and have Reduced 20lbs!!! Then I thought, since I don't have a dishwasher (see previous blog) I will let Lauryn, Liyah, Grandma Patty, Daddy and myself use the same glass all day long. If we know whose glass is whose the next morning it gets used again the next day (thank God for different colored sippy cups) thus Reusing things. Then I must say my greatest accomplishment in my quest for being more earth friendly is the Recycle!!
I am using things that have been used for years, probably centuries. I have kept them and stored them and found new and innovative ways of using them.... "Don't make me get up and come over there.", "I don't care if all your friends are doing it, you aren't.", "Clean up that room, it's a pigsty.", "Don't hit your sister.", "Don't chew with your mouth open.", "Don't tip back in your chair." "Wash your hands.", "Because, I said so"!! These are all phrases that I heard as a kid and now thanks to my quick thinking, my children too get to hear these wonderful words!
They don't respond any better than I did, but that is a totally different blog.
(Hmmm, I wonder if Liyah ever did quite picking her nose).

If you ever want to hear a great song that really goes through a lot of the insanity of being a mother, with a great dose of humor check out Anita Renfroe on YouTube. You can type in: Total Momsense Anita Renfroe in their search engine.... and now she has a newer one Total Momsense 2. If you like the things that I'm blogging about you'll love her mommy versions set to William Tells Overture!!
Take care to make sure you are doing your best to Reduce... Reuse... (I refuse to accept the dog licking the plate as clean, but you can use your own judgement) and especially Recycle. Cause you know you turned out okay, so what your parents told you must have been good!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

the New and Improved Version of 20 Questions

Since Grandma Patty has moved in with us we have relearned the joy of playing the old game, "20 Questions". She isn't able to verbally say the things that she once could, so we often resort to asking her different things for a yes or no answer.
She often is looking for something; a glass of tea (sweet of course), a hairbrush, a channel on t.v. and heaven forbid it if she can't find her purse.
The questions Greg comes up with are quite hilarious, often having nothing to do with what she is thinking (not that he knows that). She may want something like a glass of sweet tea and he'll be asking her about her clothes or room, or if she wants to go somewhere... oh, if only men could read women's minds.
He's not the only one who follows rabbit trails, I often think I've done everything for her in her morning ritual and go on my merry way with my own. One Sunday morning we were the last two to get ready for church and would you know she comes up and tells me she can't find "it". The mysterious "IT". Could be anything. I checked and she had her clothes on, she had her shoes on, jewelry (check), hair done (check), purse (check), coat (check). Finally, I just looked at her with an expectant look on my face and she finally walked into my room and pointed to the makeup on my dresser.... oh!! I had forgotten to put her makeup on her!

I think we will start playing charades soon... it usually gets to the answer quicker!!

We love Grandma Patty, we wish that she didn't have to go through this horrible disease. We really try and see the funny side of her new quirks. The girls are going to be learning a lot from her, things that they won't be learning from anyone else. Patience, compassion and love for family and friends that have these kinds of difficulties.

Even though the days are sometimes a struggle... "Yes you DO have to take that medicine!!", "Let me help you with your toothbrush", "Don't worry about the dishes, I'll get them." we still know that we are doing the right thing.

It warms my heart to see Lauryn sitting by Grandma P. reading her a book, Liyah bringing her a cup of "tea" she's made (and telling her, "Drink it Grandma!). And as long as we are all "playing together", we should all be "staying together"

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Never say "Never"

It's amazing how much you sound like your own mother when you become a mom. You know you all do that... say the things your mother said to you. Not just the words, but the same voice inflections, the same hand on hip (or finger pointing in your kids face). The same astonishment that they are doing the same things that you did, and you feel the same way that your parents did.
I'm sure that I said that "I will NEVER say that to my kids". "I would NEVER punish them for that". "I would NEVER make my child do that" (remember sitting at the table with those lumpy, cold peas on the plate, thinking about how to send them to those starving children in Africa?).
Well, I received quite the interesting statement from my five year old, Lauryn the other day. She was being her horrible, mouthy self and I looked at her with my hand on my hip in my best "mommy" pose and said, "You know, they say that when you have kids of your own they are going to treat you 100 times worse to you treat your own mother." How brilliant that was, to keep my cool in a heated situation. To not yell back at her. To once again rise above the trap of arguing with her.... I patted myself on the back mentally, for about 15 seconds, until she glared at me and yelled "I'm NEVER having children!!!"
Well, there goes that argument. Now how will she get her paybacks for the torment she puts me through... oh yeah, it's called baby pics coming out on her first date night!
I do know that if her life turns out anything like mine has, she will probably find out that when she says "NEVER" about something that is the one thing that is likely to happen.
Like me saying I would never marry a man who was smaller than me, yeah, that didn't happen (and no matter how much I've fed him in the last 7 years he still doesn't gain). Like me saying I would never move back to the rural community that I grew up in, since there was nothing to do there (I apologize to the community of Lakeview, but I was a youth at the time of that statement). Like me saying I would never make my kids eat their dinner before they had dessert (okay so parents are smarter than kids when it comes to nutrition).
So, while Lauryn is never having children, I have two that need to constantly be reminded how not to do or how to do things. They never think they need to be told anything, but mommy does know best. If I don't I'm much better at getting them to think I do!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Why I live in insanity

There must be a reason I have a husband, a five year old, three year old and a 62 year old mother-in-law (with frontal temporal dementia) living under one roof with me!! I am a certifiable, undeniable and self-proclaimed INSANE mommy!! The ONLY reason I choose to live my life like this is because I love'em. Yes, all of them!
Some days I dabble with thoughts of sanity, then I remember how much duller my life was. How QUIET, how smooth, how timely, how "gourmet" my life was and quickly get back to cleaning up my kid's spilled juice, yelling at them to get going out the door so they won't be late for school, packing lunches and running them to school (I forgot okay 2 showers, 4 breakfasts, 3 outfits on, 3 sets of teeth brushed and a load of laundry before 8:30 am, I don't know how I forgot, but I did). Oh, and let's not forget my wonderful husband, who is quite the independent man. I don't have to dress him, feed him or shower him, he is quite the guy. He is definitely the one who reminds me of all the things that I forgot to do...sometimes he even picks up my pieces. He has CHOSEN to take this trip to insanity with me...God bless Him!!
Today, well, today is pretty smooth sailing. Mother-in-law (heretofore referred to as Grandma Patty) is feeling dizzy since yesterday afternoon. Yes, the dizziness induced a round of vomiting, that nearly got me to kneel before the porcelain throne too!! We made it through that, and now I'm trying to keep her as still as possible so we don't go down that road again today.
My oldest, Lauryn, is at school taking her first day of "Stanford Tests" that will show how she has progressed through her first year of school. She finished Kind. and 1st grade work this year @ five years old. She is reading at a 2nd grade level. While, I'm very VERY proud of her, her stubbornness and need for the last word was one of my first tastes of insanity. (It gets worse with age doesn't it? Hers and Mine)
Liyah, the 3 year old, is my HUNGRY kid. She thinks if she doesn't eat every hour she is going to fade away. Thank God, she likes most foods including fresh fruits and veggies!! My second step into the wildly hilarious world of insanity was when she started crawling...and emptying out every drawer and cupboard she could reach. As you can imagine this too has progressively sent me further down the slippery slope. Of course once she gets things out it doesn't pick up itself!!
AHHH, she still takes naps thank you Jesus!!

That is a glimpse, tiny but oh so true. I do love this life. Always wanted to stay home and raise children and do the homey things. I didn't actually expect that to be PB&J's 4 out of 5 days and chicken nuggets for Sunday Dinner!!!!