Friday, May 8, 2009

The I Don't Care Song

Written by: Mom
Written for: Lauryn and Liyah

(To the Tune of Three Blind Mice)

I don't care, I don't care
I don't care, I don't care
I'll stick you out with the dog tonight
I'll hang you up by your toes from the light
'Cause I don't care, I don't care.


I don't care, I don't care
I don't care, I don't care
I'll cut off your hair with a really sharp knife
I'll tickle you till you scream for your life
'Cause I don't care, I don't care

I don't care, I don't care
I don't care, I don't care
I'll swing you around 'til you upchuck your lunch
I'll serve you some bugs and worms in your punch
'Cause I don't care, I don't care

I don't care, I don't care
I don't care, I don't care
I'll put a snake into your bed
I'll let the dog lick you until you beg
'Cause I don't care, I don't care.

Author's note: I do care about my children and family very much. I love them or I wouldn't be here with them (believe me no one would stay in this house except for love). This song came out of my mouth one evening, probably after a long day of insanity, when Lauryn and Liyah were begging to do something, something like go outside in -10 below or such. I had been telling them no and they wouldn't quit. So I said, "What would you do if you went out and your nose fell off, or your toes froze and turned black and you had icicles hanging from your ears. That wouldn't be good would it?" Every mom should learn not to ask a rhetorical question to a 5 and 2 year old. They quite emphatically said, "I don't care." Their patent answer when they want to do something that isn't good for them. So, I made up this silly song to get there minds off going out, or running with scissors, or giving each other haircuts, or whatever was going on that day. The girls like it so much that they ask me to make up new "horrible things" to sing about. It's fun and it's just a little crazy, which fits me perfectly.
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO USE THIS SONG WITH YOUR CHILDREN. MAKE UP NEW AND GLORIOUSLY ERADIC VERSES AND POST THEM IN MY COMMENTS. I'M ALWAYS LOOKING FOR NEW THREATS TO FEED MY CHILDREN!

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